Would you believe this photo was not posed AT ALL? Completely organic photo after running around the park, picking flowers, and playing ring around the rosy.
I’m not a numbers girl, but I’d be willing to bet a large percentage of families long for beautiful, frame-worthy family photos that grandma would cry over…but the stress of getting them done (especially with a moody toddler or awkward teen) outweighs the desire to actually book a photographer. As a photographer, I’ve seen it so many times:
“I feel like such a bad parent—we haven’t gotten a real family photo since our first born…now we have four!”
“Last family photo session was melt down city so we will see how this goes.”
“Can you edit out the tears?”
Of course, I’ve had some jolly families who are so game to take their yearly picture, but even the Joneses could use tips on making that tradition go more smoothly.
The beautiful thing about my photography business is that it’s built on not just 15 years of photo experience, BUT ALSO ten years of childcare and education experience. I have spent many daytime hours as a preschool teacher, long-term nanny, youth arts mentor, and elementary educator. Protecting and cheering for childhood, girlhood, boyhood is a huge piece of who I am. I’ve seen so many unique and lovely forms of “kiddo.” And 90% of the time, all those unique and special littles have one thing in common: they want to play. Even the teens.
So that’s the secret. Play. But what does that actually mean for your family photos? Here are 3 ways I use PLAY to get the photos you’ll cherish forever.
To make kids comfortable: I am already a random adult in their safe-zone. If your child even has a little anxiety, a non-family member with a big camera asking them to SAY CHEESE and do a funny pose is not going to feel super warm and fuzzy right away. I start my sessions, especially with real littles, asking them to show me their favorite toys, share their interests, or teach me their favorite game. Kids introduce themselves so often with “Wanna play?” Why not meet them where they are at so the guard comes down? Almost instantly, the more natural smiles that come from being comfortable emerge.
Play reveals the perfect location for your photoshoot: Go ahead and forget about finding a random trendy location in town. Once again, we want kids to feel comfortable and safe enough to play! Unfamiliar locations just add to the awkwardness and anxiety. I am such a huge believer in HOME PHOTOSHOOTS. Your kids come alive here, ready to show off their rooms, backyards, favorite toys. And families often forget that we should probably take time to remember the sacred spaces where we have raised our families. Cook your favorite meal together, spread a picnic out in the backyard, set up a tent, climb the favorite tree—these are already instantly more meaningful and visually interesting photographs than at a random garden! If you want to branch out, pick a park or playground your child is very familiar with! As long as they can play and explore comfortably. The question, “Where will my kids smile and play the most?” will often lead you to some great location options. If you long for a studio session—bring a bag of toys or favorite board game to make it easy to loosen up in front of the camera.
Play makes ‘posing’ unnecessary: Ever see your kid playing and you close your eyes and try to make time freeze? All the time, right? We want to remember our kids being themselves, doing what they love. The movement, laughs, and funny situations kids get into when playing are some of the most beautiful things I have the honor of photographing. Even when I am taking pictures of an adult model I spend way more time encouraging them to move and dance rather than “pose.” The posing comes so much more naturally when the body feels permission to move and relax. If you are still concerned with posing your kids Shirley-Temple-style, I get it! Those cute little legs crossed, hand on the hip poses are so much easier when we have played a while and built trust with kids. Then the posing becomes yet another game we can play and giggle over.
That’s it! This is my golden rule for family sessions. Don’t be afraid of play, to get the nice clothes a little messy. You know by now, dear parent, there is beauty in the mess, the perfectly imperfect.
I’ll leave you with this: The unspoken rule behind ‘play’ is flexibility. There will sometimes be tears, stubbornness, etc. Don’t force anything—you don’t want that photo anyways. Find a photographer who builds time for meltdowns, diaper changes, and shyness into their family sessions. I always tag an hour cushion time onto my family shoots. Kids are often unpredictable but that is so much of why we love them.
I’d love to know in the comments…what games do you play with your littles? Is there a special room in your home that might be perfect for a photoshoot? What toy/joke/funny face never fails to make your kid smile?
Carolina locals: holler at me to set up a playful family photoshoot soon!